thanksgiving: a re-cap

this was in a lot of ways a thanksgiving of firsts. it was my first thanksgiving away from home, my first time cooking for 8 hours straight, and my first time cooking a turkey. i made a few of mom's ttd's, or 'typical thanksgiving dishes.'

the menu included a baked brie cheese with apples and a 3-cheese hot artichoke dip to start, followed up by pumpkin soup, then stuffing with cranberries, mashed potatoes with celery root & gruyere, brussels sprouts with shallots, glazed carrots, green beans & mushrooms, and a caprese salad. the food came out perfectly-- i was really quite impressed, especially with the turkey, which was juicy & full of flavor. i think rubbing it with butter, garlic & shallots helped. of course, it wasn't without any trouble-- two hours after putting it in the oven, i had to call dad in a bit of a panic to find out why the thermometer was reading 180 degrees already. turns out we hadn't placed it in a deep enough spot. thanks dad :)

all in all it was a fun (though exhausting) day. our friends arrived at 7pm and we had a great time with them. here are some pics:

the prized turkey. there was some fighting over the drumsticks, but i think the boys worked it out.

serhat, my saving grace! he showed up at 4pm and didn't stop cooking until i did. what a huge help!

the gals- enjoying the food with a view of the city.
can & can, feeling a little stuffed i think.

the help ; )

heaven ain't hard to find

right before thanksgiving, just as i was beginning to freak out about where i was going to find some of the key ingredients for our dinner, some wonderful & kind american friends took us on a field trip... to the commissary! what is it? it's a magical place for military personnel where they have an american grocery store & mini wal-mart type store that sell products at normal american prices... right here in ankara! ben and i were like a couple of kids on christmas morning, running through the isles, filling our cart. i finished the shopping while ben went to buy beer & wine (waaay cheaper than at any turkish grocery).

look what we found! (the coors light was for our friend yelin, who went to school in alabama & lists it (along with beef jerky) as the things he misses most.)

i mean this grocery store had EVERYTHING... so we bought some non-perishable items to tide us over for a while-- like frank's hot sauce, canned black beans, and a few spices.

craisins, cranberries and turkey broth!

bacon, tostitos & salsa, oatmeal, folger's coffee... my pantry runeth over. literally.

giving thanks

well, we're back in turkey. actually we've been back for two weeks now, i just haven't had the time to blog. the wedding was a complete whirlwind, but wonderful. i think it was everything sarah & jeffrey had wanted, and more beautiful than any of us could have imagined. it was full of candlelight. romantic, intimate, and emotional.

now we're back in turkey, and the re-adjusting has begun. it was hard to come back. after being home for only a week, and having so much fun with my family and close friends, i had to board a plane and go far away all over again. that was difficult. and upon arriving, i was reminded that i'm a foreigner in a strange land, where i don't speak the language (though i'm working on it), and where i have no old friends. i spent the first week feeling pretty down, but this week i'm doing my best to turn it around. it's thanksgiving, after all, and that means a time to give thanks! so i would like to count the following blessings:

:: ben. he is such a source of strength support, and love for me. he constantly is reminding me that he is here for me. what can i say-- he's pretty great!

:: family. even though they are far away, i feel their presence in my life every day, as they support me from afar. during the wedding week i was reminded of how extraordinarily close we are. i was also fortunate to get a glimpse of us through the eyes of our new family, the stephens, with the many wonderful remarks they made. here in turkey, and far away in australia, i also have a family, including three new aunts, two new grandmothers, and a little brother. i am so grateful to them for accepting me, immediately, as one of their own.

:: friends, old and new. while i was home i was visited by a few old friends. it was wonderful to sit and talk about our lives, our every day, just like we used to. i miss them so much but i know i can look forward to seeing them again whenever i return.

now that i'm back in turkey, i'm also reminded of the many new friends i've made in the short time i've been here. about 14 of them will come to my house tomorrow to help me celebrate thanksgiving, which says a lot about their thoughtfulness & how much they care about my fitting in here. our good friend serhat will even come early to help us cook, his wife is bringing apple pie.

tonight and tomorrow, as i cook & bake up a storm, i will be counting each of these blessings. happy thanksgiving.

wedding weekend underway

well it's 8:30am and all is quiet at 17 hamilton ave as the family rests. we're getting ready for two crazy days... and the fun has already begun! last night we did a lady's and men's night out, respectively. sarah & i picked alexa up at the airport & then headed to kitty hoyne's irish pub. there we met up with mom, lynn (jeffrey's mom), my aunt noel who flew in from san francisco yesterday, lynn's two friends anne and lani, and mom's close friend chris from skaneateles. we had a great time toasting to sarah & catching up with friends we hadn't seen in a long time. poor alexa was jet-lagged and sick with a cold, but she hung in there.

meanwhile ben & dad were out with the men (jeff's dad dave, my uncle jim, and a few other friends), who went to the sherwood inn in skaneateles.

it was fun and now it's time to gear up for a long day of preparations. the first item on my to-do list is a trip to syracuse to pick up my dress for the wedding, now that the alterations are complete. then it's off to have pedi's and mani's at a local salon. at 4pm i'll head to the church to rehearse a song i will sing at the wedding ('to make you feel my love') with the musician, and at 5pm the rehearsal will begin! whew. i'm tired already.

back in the usa... for a bit

we returned to the usa yesterday (ben & i). after a 9 hour flight (which, surprisingly, departed on time- and we were even going to arrive early except that jfk made us circle for 30 minutes instead) we passed easily through customs & passport control (ben was not detained, we're so thankful), and then waited about 20 minutes for our suitcases to appear on the luggage carousel. this always seems a cruel joke from someone watching from above, when you're as exhausted as we were. of course,that was nothing compared to the hour long wait we had at the national car rental. if you're flying into jfk, take my advice & never rent a car from that location. i've never had a good experience, and this one was probably the worst. BUT we were lucky in that we ended up with an upgrade & now are feeling like true americans, driving around in an embarrassingly large saturn suv.

we loaded the car & proceeded out of the airport, following the 'exit' signs carefully but still ending up on the wrong path... neither of us was thinking straight & jfk airport's traffic pattern required more thought than either of us could hadle. this resulted in a lovely tour down the belt parkway which took us past coney island, sheepshead bay, and the verazzano bridge. slight detour.

an hour or so later we pulled into hoboken, unloaded the car & had a wonderful welcome at sarah & jeffrey's apartment. so happy to be here, with family, for this wonderful event of my sister's wedding! today we'll head up to auburn (maybe making a few short stops at various outlets along the way). can't wait to be back at home for a bit.

i'll try to post pics & stories as 'wedding week 2008' progresses...

hope

this morning ben & i woke up at 7am (that's 12am eastern standard time) in a hotel in istanbul and immediately turned on the tv, just in time for barack obama to begin his speech after the election win. after watching the coverage all day yesterday (here it's been covered on english stations bbc world & al jazeera network), we've heard many different perspectives from all over the world, including afhanistan, iraq, iran and many african countries, and all echoed one message: a message of hope.

today throughout our meetings at a local university located on the black sea, the conversation inevitably turned to obama's win, and the president, too, spoke of hope. he recalled a year spent in belfast, maine 40 years ago, a study-abroad opportunity presented to him as a high school student. he laughed when he recalled meeting the son of his host-parents, who looked him over & asked, before saying hello, if he had bought his clothing in new york city (assuming people in turkey would dress very differently). he described this year as one of the best in his life, and went on to say that 30 years later his 'american mom' came to visit he & his wife here in turkey, another memory he counts as the best in his life.

he also said he knows that american people are as a whole good, friendly people (his example: when visiting his wife's family in britain, he would never dare to look in the fridge for a snack, while in america, after 30 years, he would still feel comfortable peeking into the fridge of his host family).

he couldn't find a reason why we had chosen such bad leadership in recent history, but feels that this also seems to be a trend throughout the world- even here in turkey. electing obama has given him hope for america, hope for the future, and the leaders of the world.

i think his is a pretty good sentiment to illustrate how so many of us feel today. hooray for obama! HOORAY FOR CHANGE!!

some highlights

...from last night.

a gypsy, mccain, palin, and a tennis player.

mccain and palin got down... oh yes we did.
homer & marge made an appearance.

mccain kept the crowd entertained. it was the least he could do-- though everyone was concerned he might have a heart attack.

our host, the turkish ali g.

election 2008

with the election just days away, it seems to influence every conversation as of late, even here in turkey. last night ben & i went to a halloween party hosted by the cultural affairs officer, tom, and his wife. there was a man there dressed as 'election 2008.' a clever costume! ben and i went as mccain & palin (though not in that order), and i will post pictures soon.

this election is the first i have witnessed in my life to pique such strong emotions from everyone, of all backgrounds. below is a letter written in explanation, written by my the man who served as the best man at my parent's wedding, one of dad's closest friends, my uncle bill. i hope he won't mind my posting it here, but i think it needs to be shared, as it so eloquently speaks to what i know is true in my heart:

October, 2008

Dear Family and Friends,

A friend of mine recently said, “One thing worse than talking politics with family and friends, this year, is not talking about it.” He got me thinking and I decided to write this short letter about why I’m voting for Obama-Biden. Please understand that my love and loyalty to you is not at risk. I’m not judging you regardless of your political leaning and I hope you won’t judge me. You can read, copy, forward or delete this message. I don’t expect any response. I just want to have my say.

I’ve been very blessed in my life. I grew up in Lorain, Ohio long before “diversity” was a cliché and I learned that a jumble of people from all over the world was normal. I carried that lesson into my adult life and have lived and worked in environments where racial, cultural, gender and language differences are a good thing. I’ve always felt lucky to have been born in Lorain and in the United States and I also realize that my birth was a roll of the dice. Along the way, as I’ve loved my country, I’ve also been aware that we are 5% of the world’s population. The notion that “we’re number one” has always rung a false note for me and, while maintaining my gratitude for my home country, I’ve leaned towards the “We’re all in this together” perspective. I’ve believed this in my personal life, my professional life and in the way I view myself in the larger world. When I lived in Syracuse in the 60’s and 70’s a Native American friend taught me the Great Law of the Iroquois Confederacy, “In our every deliberation, we must consider the impact of our decisions on the next seven generations.” I’m the first to admit I’ve lived an imperfect life and I haven’t always acted according to that Law, but the words have guided me and sum up a lot of my philosophy and world view.

That brings me to Election 2008. I won’t review all the reasons for and against Obama or McCain. I’ll just outline my personal reasons for supporting Obama and Biden.

Like it or not (I personally like it), we live in an increasingly diverse world with increasingly unclear boundaries. For the sake of our “next seven generations” we have to become more willing to understand and live with the diversity that is irreversible.

When I look at Obama and the people around him I see the next seven generations. In McCain I see the past. I’m not worried about the past affiliations of either of either man or running mate, whether it be William Ayers or the Keating Five. I care about their current affiliations and I see that Obama is connected with a much wider representation of the real world than McCain. Of course I can’t predict with certainty that taking a reasoned, collaborative approach to our place in the world will yield peace and prosperity, but I think it’s our greatest hope. I’ve certainly seen this approach work on a microcosmic level in my own work in Rhode Island. I definitely don’t believe that we can continue the “Us and Them” approach of recent years. I believe that if Obama is elected there will be an immediate enhancement of own image across the world. This will open opportunities for negotiation and cooperation that we can exploit to the advantage of everyone. One of my skeptical friends says I’m a dreamer and that every politician makes promises he/she doesn’t keep. I know that, but I’ve also known a few who have been true inspirational leaders who have kept their word, or enough of it to matter. I’m without any blind illusions and I’m hopeful.

I’ve lived through almost thirty years, starting with Reagan, of a growing belief that “government isn’t the answer to the problem, it IS the problem.” I think that belief has become a self-fulfilling prophesy. The more we believe it, the more we undermine government. I was inspired by Jack Kennedy in my youth to become a teacher because he believed that public service is an obligation and a great honor. I have seen government at its best a few times in my adulthood, generating philosophies, policies and practices that were honest and effective. For example, I worked at the Providence Mental health Center from 1978-1986 during the “golden years” of community mental health and saw the extraordinarily positive effects that well-financed, accountable public services can have on individuals, families and communities. I have also seen the gradual dismemberment of the public mental health system in the last twenty years. I’d love to see a return to a belief that GOOD government is one of the answers to our problems. From my point of view, Obama and his associates are much more attuned to this perspective than McCain and Company. I can even envision myself returning to work in the Obama years.

Finally, a personal note. I’m not a one issue or a one party voter and never have been. Since 1961 when I first voted I’ve cast ballots for Democrats, Republicans, Independents, Libertarians and, yes, a Socialist. My vote has always depended on the person and the issues, not the party. I’m also gay and, as I’ve gotten older I’ve seen my status improve (most people couldn’t care less “what” I am as long as I’m a decent, reliable person) and I’ve also seen my world become riskier. More visibility means more danger. I have more vocal enemies than ever. I see nothing in McCain or his associates that tells me that my future and the future of the next seven generations of gay people is safe. Obama and the people around him, while not the allies I dream of, are at least willing to talk about us as full members of the community and give me hope that some day we’ll officially be first class citizens.

Of course I have many more opinions, but this is enough. If you got this far without hitting “Delete,” thanks for reading. Get out and vote.

Love,

Bill and Uncle Bill